Chapter 51: The most unsuccessful rebirth

Call Meng Zhi.

No matter how hard Feng Xiyue tried, she couldn’t imagine those words coming from her mother’s mouth.

It was like some rotten secret being torn open and exposed to the sunlight. For the first time since her rebirth, Feng Xiyue lost control of her emotions in front of her mother:

“Are you crazy? What do our issues have to do with Meng Zhi? Why drag her into this?”

“I know you two have been close lately.” The woman’s voice was cold and restrained, unaffected by Feng Xiyue’s outburst. “Maybe you’ll listen to what she says.”

“What are you talking about? I’ve only known her a few days!”

“But I’m out of options. I have to treat a dead horse as a live one and try. You don’t listen to me—what else can a mother do?”

A flood of words choked in Feng Xiyue’s throat.

She looked at the woman’s face with despair. The woman gazed down at her, her eyes filled with pity, regret, and helplessness.

…As if lamenting why she’d given birth to such a hopeless piece of trash.

Feng Xiyue suddenly couldn’t breathe. She’d never imagined her actions after rebirth would cause such a butterfly effect.

The woman’s words were seamless, but Feng Xiyue caught the chilling threat beneath them.

She might have realized something.

She might have noticed Feng Xiyue didn’t just see Meng Zhi as a sister.

She was just giving her a way out.

“…Why?”

Finally, pale-faced, Feng Xiyue lowered her head, the light in her eyes fading completely: “Why do you have to call her?”

“Because I’ve talked to her father about her.”

The woman said softly: “Her father feels guilty, doesn’t have the courage to talk to her. So I have to be the bad guy.”

“You don’t need to worry. I won’t say anything I shouldn’t. Just ask her to help persuade you to stop messing with that crooked music and focus on studying.”

“…That’s all.”

In that instant, Feng Xiyue lifted her head, her eyes blazing with resentment.

“Crooked music? Focus on studying?”

“You know, you’re the last person in the world who gets to say that!”

“How many parent-teacher meetings did you attend? How many times did you pick me up or drop me off? Do you even know which subjects I was good at or bad at?”

“After Dad left, I was bullied at school every day by those btches, cornered in the bathroom, my hair yanked out strand by strand! When I begged you for help, where the fck were you?”

“You were busy cozying up with your new boy toy! Off on some damn Japan trip!”

“You knew how much I hated and feared that school, but you pretended nothing was wrong and blamed me for not going!”

“You play the pitiful single mom to the world, but you’ve never once done what a mother should!”

The girl’s screams were raw, as if she were pouring out her soul. The woman just watched silently, not saying a word.

Only when the girl, eyes red, stared at her did she speak, as if nothing had happened:

“So.”

“This call. Do I make it or not?”

Feng Xiyue’s eyes widened, then slowly dimmed.

…Right.

If she could ever listen to me.

Would I have had to elope with Meng Zhi so desperately in the last life?

She was the most disgusting person in this disgusting world.

Feng Xiyue had never escaped the swamp she’d left her in. All this time, she’d just been flailing, giving up on herself.

The morning sun had fully risen. Its light fell on her, cold and sharp.

As the woman raised her phone again, she heard Feng Xiyue’s faint, pleading voice.

“…Don’t call.”

“…I’ll go change. I’ll go back to school this afternoon.” Feng Xiyue bit her lip bitterly, swallowing the blood.

The woman nodded, satisfied.

“Let’s go. The car’s waiting.”

She put an arm around the girl’s shoulders, guiding her slowly out of the complex.

At the gate, Feng Xiyue looked up, her lifeless eyes heavy with exhaustion, gazing at the towering buildings in the distance.

A new day, and the city was waking up again. Repeating its cold, suffocating mechanical rhythm.

It hadn’t changed a bit because of her rebirth. Just like her life.

…I might be the most failed reincarnator.

Others rewrite their endings, make up for regrets.

But me? Not only have I changed nothing.

I’ve lost what was supposed to be mine.

Every choice since my rebirth feels wrong.

I shouldn’t have gotten so close to Meng Zhi, drawing that woman’s attention.

I shouldn’t have tried to stop her from taking the college entrance exam, making her completely give up on me.

In my last life, at least I had a world with just her and music.

But this time.

I won’t get to wait for her to take me and elope from this nauseating city.

… I have nothing left.

Maybe it was the emotional outburst. As they reached the car by the roadside, Feng Xiyue suddenly rushed to a tree pit and vomited.

The woman frowned slightly, her voice growing colder: “…Did you sleep with her?”

Feng Xiyue couldn’t say a word.

She just kept retching, using all her strength to fight her body’s convulsions.

“No going home. To the hospital.”

The woman turned to the man in the driver’s seat: “If there’s anything, take care of it.”

The man hesitated, said nothing, and nodded.

She vomited for several minutes. When Feng Xiyue wiped her mouth and stood, she stared blankly at the sky.

After a long moment, she smiled.

A bleak, wretched smile.

Three in the afternoon.

“Yo, you’re up.”

Seeing Chen Xinya shuffle out of the room, rubbing her head groggily, Meng Zhi said casually: “Not cooking? I’ll order takeout then.”

“Mmm… too tired to cook.”

Chen Xinya whined pitifully: “I didn’t know staying up all night at an internet cafe was this exhausting.”

“It’s not exactly a good thing. Only you were silly enough to insist on coming.”

Meng Zhi teased, then started browsing takeout options.

Chen Xinya wobbled into the bathroom, used the toilet, and washed her face. Seeing the heavy bags under her eyes in the mirror, she suddenly regretted it.

…Should’ve skipped the all-nighter.

Coming out, she asked casually: “What’d you order?”

“…Meng Zhi?”

She noticed Meng Zhi wasn’t answering, her expression slightly heavy as she stared at her phone.

“What’s wrong?” Chen Xinya felt uneasy.

Meng Zhi paused, not hiding it from her: “My dad sent me a message.”

“He says Feng Xiyue’s… in the hospital. Asked if I want to go see her.”

“…Huh?”