Vol2 Chapter 25: Maybe there will never be an answer.

Bai Ci sat on the hospital bed in a patient gown, gazing at the distant sky where the fiery sunset burned away the last traces of dusk. The air around her was quiet and warm, as if the world had slowed to match her mood. She let out a soft sigh, her fingers absently tracing the edge of the bed. The room was silent, save for the faint hum of medical equipment and the occasional clink of a needle.

She was recovering quickly—no real injuries, just exhaustion.

Her gaze shifted, landing on Lu Mingfei, slumped in the chair by her bed, fast asleep. He was always so carefree, defenseless, sleeping like a child.

“Lu Mingfei…” she murmured, her voice barely audible.

She watched him for a long time, as she always had.

For as long as she could remember, she’d been drawn to watching him—whether he was dozing like this, battling at his computer, or nodding off in class. She couldn’t help but focus on him.

How long had it been like this?

She couldn’t quite recall. It felt like forever, long enough that she’d grown used to his presence every day, used to his cowardly, hopeless demeanor, his offbeat humor, and his silly chatter.

She’d always thought herself calm, rational, independent—emotions were beyond her control. But when Chen Wenwen called him over, an inexplicable anger flared within her. She couldn’t name the feeling, but it was intense.

The first time she saw Lu Mingfei, hair neatly combed, dressed sharply to meet Chen Wenwen, she’d nodded and said he looked good. But inside, she thought, You’re wasting your effort looking so confident. The girl you like doesn’t like you back. She’s got her eyes on someone else. No matter how handsome you are, you can’t compare to her crush. When she rejects you, you’ll cry alone. When you come back heartbroken, I’ll treat you to a Nutri-Express and some spicy sticks. We can game together—wouldn’t that be better?

To her surprise, he’d returned cheerful and bought her a cola.

From then on, she disliked Chen Wenwen. If you don’t like him, just say so. Why string him along?

The more time she spent with Lu Mingfei, the more she resented Chen Wenwen.

Stop following her. Isn’t hanging out with me better? Don’t go…

An uncomfortable feeling welled up, impossible to suppress.

She’d never felt this way before, not then, not now. “He” never sought comfort or showed weakness—“A man doesn’t cry easily.”

But she was a girl now, wasn’t she?

Was it okay to want a little indulgence?

Something was shifting deep within—a warmth, a reliance she’d never known. Whenever she saw Lu Mingfei, she couldn’t help wanting to be near him, to spend more time with him. Even just seeing him lifted her mood inexplicably.

What a strange feeling… Was this love? Or just dependence and care?

Bai Ci let out a soft laugh, reaching out to muss his hair into a bird’s nest.

She scooted closer to the bed’s edge, extending her arm to gently scratch his ear. Lu Mingfei twitched, his ear itching, his eyes crinkling as if dreaming.

Watching him, a chuckle rose in her heart, tinged with worry. What was in his dreams? Raging storms or blooming flowers? His lashes fluttered like butterflies hovering over blossoms. Her gaze traced his face, from his messy hair to his boyish features, her fingers gliding lightly across his cheek like a breeze—playful yet cautious.

Lu Mingfei wrinkled his nose unconsciously, shifting as if dodging or seeking something.

He must’ve stayed by me a long time. Otherwise, he wouldn’t sleep so deeply.

Bai Ci studied his sleeping profile. The usually carefree, sometimes clumsy boy was now quiet as a child, radiating a comforting aura. She could feel the faint warmth of his breath in the air.

Her fingers teased his ear, longing to hear his voice, to see his sleepy, bleary-eyed face. What a tender scene—she’d never imagined she’d have such delicate feelings for someone.

Finally, Lu Mingfei’s eyes cracked open, his gaze hazy and confused. He blinked, shaking off sleep. Bai Ci’s hand froze mid-air.

He lifted his head slowly, his eyes landing on her face with a mix of surprise and puzzlement.

Her breath quickened, a faint blush spreading across her cheeks, like sunset embers on her skin.

“You’re awake?”

“Yeah… How’re you feeling?”

“Not bad.”

“Don’t push yourself too hard… You don’t always have to go all out.”

“My choice.” Bai Ci’s face returned to its usual calm.

“Listen to me.” Lu Mingfei placed his hand on her head, stroking gently as if petting a cat. “I don’t want anything to happen to you…”

Beneath his calm facade, Lu Mingfei was a nervous wreck. Xia Mi and Fingel swore this move was foolproof—even the iciest girl would want a shoulder to lean on. Just hug Bai Ci and don’t overthink it. But he chickened out on the hug, settling for a head pat.

Her hair was soft, warm, and nice to touch.

Bai Ci’s fingers tightened on the bedsheet, as if trying to knead the fabric into her palm. Her calm face flushed, the red creeping from her ears to her neck, like sunset ashes scattered on her pale skin. Her eyes darted to the bed’s corner, lashes trembling like startled butterfly wings, trying to hide the flicker in her gaze.

She instinctively shrank back but froze, as if spellbound. The warmth from Lu Mingfei’s hand seeped through her hair, making her scalp tingle, her pores radiating shy heat. Her fingers fidgeted with her sleeve, knuckles whitening, as if crushing her unease into the fabric. A faint whimper caught in her throat, bitten back as her teeth left crescent marks on her pale pink lips. Finally, as if giving up, she murmured, “Mm… got it…”

She still wasn’t sure if this was “love.” But one thing was clear: when he was hurt, her heart ached like it was pierced; when he was ignored, she felt a quiet resentment; when he stayed by her side like this, she felt an unmatched sense of safety, even… a sense of being cherished.

This might be what she craved—not about love or not, but his presence, a harbor where she could drop all her defenses.

She closed her eyes, soaking in this unique warmth. She knew she might never define this feeling clearly. She had no answers, maybe never would. She just hoped he’d always be by her side.