Chapter 10: Joyful Greens, Come to my bowl!

“Honored Lord,” Onyx shook her shoulder, “wake up!”

“Wah wah wah, what is it?”

Chen Xing, dozing on the command throne, opened her watery blue eyes.

Focus returned after a dazed blink.

Battle alarms blared.

“Waaaaaaaagh!!!!!”

Comms overflowed with meaningless war-cries.

A warship cobbled from cosmic junk trailed thick smoke, charging Chen Xing.

Orks aboard waved mismatched weapons.

Crude armor clanged.

They itched to leap over for a jolly waaagh.

Aboard the Ork privateer Bang-Bang Jumpa, Captain Bloodhand Lok stood high, swinging his power claw.

Two snots oiling hydraulics were flung skyward, splatting the ceiling into paste.

“Ladz! Board dat ship! Kill all da humies!”

“Waaaaaaagh!!!”

Orks roared earth-shakingly.

Engine-room overseer kicked a coal-shoveling snot into the boiler.

Others panicked, shoveling faster, wishing for three arms.

On this “I fink it works” ship, nothing was unreasonable.

Black-smoked Ork hulk accelerated impossibly.

Chen Xing gawked—how did this junk heap not disintegrate?

Even in 40K, physics mostly applied.

Orks openly cheated—“Waaagh! energy” terrifying.

[Host! Enemy firing!]

“Hm,” Chen Xing sat regal on throne, “their aim sucks. Stay calm.”

Before words finished, her disguised Lunar-class nimbly dodged chaotic fire.

Ork shells varied: powder-packed iron lumps, weird-guided missiles, and… uh… snots!

Gun boss, impatient for ammo, fired the gunners themselves.

Snots flew Superman-style into void, vanishing.

No shells? Fire the crew—only Orks.

[Enemy closing to 8,400 meters! Host, we can’t escape!]

“Hmph, surprise first,” Chen Xing calm, “drop disguise. Bio-plasma cannons, ready fire.”

Hololith camouflage shattered.

Bland Lunar-class morphed into white Tyranid bio-ship—juvenile hive ship.

Full-grown: over 200 kilometers!

Even juvenile, deadly!

Muscle bundles and ligaments aligned massive bio-plasmic cannons on the waaagh-charging Bang-Bang Jumpa.

Bridge-bound Bloodhand Lok jaw-dropped—then ate bio-plasma.

Equivalent to Imperial lance turret: long range, pinpoint, devastating.

Chen Xing’s strongest anti-ship weapon.

Plasma-blasted Bang-Bang Jumpa lost control.

Orks tried recovery, but slid to 3,000 meters.

Next second—tentacles!

Barbed lash-tendrils bound bridge and hull.

Faced with ramming Tyranid, Orks thrilled.

“Wot da zog is dis?!” Bloodhand Lok roared. “Ladz, krump ‘em!”

“Waaaaagh!”

Captain’s hype boosted morale.

Orks geared for happy WAAAGH.

But patchwork decks hissed with acid.

Gathered snots and boyz watched weakening metal, terrified.

Instant collapse—countless Tyranids poured in.

“Waaaaaaagh!!!”

Screee! Skree!

Combat erupted.

Orks countered with choppas, shootas, rokkits—waaagh-firing.

Tyranids adapted, targeting weaknesses.

Hormagaunts, termagants, warriors, endless rippers—basic quartet spewed from hatchery.

Shells unhardened, they charged.

One Pregnancy Eight Treasures + shorten gestation = horrifying troop spam!

Orks soon dwindled.

Tyranids endless.

Rippers dragged both sides’ dead, licking blood and spores clean.

Bio-mass surged—more Tyranids.

Bang-Bang Jumpa falling.

“No one takes me ship!” Bloodhand Lok led elites. “Ladz, krump dese weird gitz, waaaaaaaagh!”

“Waaaaaaaagh!”

Mightiest charge yet.

Thousands of Tyranids shredded.

Victory dawned.

Then—psionic wave crushed vanguard.

A zoanthrope appeared.

“Aiya ya ya, such naughty bio-mass~ Come to bowl~”

Onyx in zoanthrope amped psionics.

Brain swelled, cortical folds pulsed blue.

High-frequency shockwave.

Nearby Orks smoked heads, eyes blank—swarmed, dismembered.

“Forward! For our Honored Lord—slaughter! Devour! Crush resistance!”

Her will via synaptic net erased survival instinct.

Cautious gaunts and termagants charged suicidally.

Rippers formed shrieking bug-sea, covering deck.

Onyx’s zoanthrope floated in mini-swarm core, psionically shielding.

They devoured all, surging upper decks.

Meanwhile, Bloodhand Lok fled, battered, prized mega-claw lost.

“Kap’n,” a nob asked, “wot now?”

“Can’t win, run! Prep getaway!”

“Aye! Leg it!”

Rearguard left, Lok escaped in shuttle.

Swore bigger, meaner ship next time!

But as Orks thought safe—shuttle shuddered.

Tentacle snared patchwork hull—yanked back.

“We’z doomed!”

Screams—shuttle and Orks tossed into maw.

Ring-teeth crunched to bits.