Chapter 94: Reasons for wanting to meet.

It’s easier to breathe. My body feels lighter.
The heart and the body are intimately linked; they influence each other.
When the body breaks, the heart weakens; there’s even a saying that illness begins in the mind.
Since they share the same vessel, perhaps there is no corner one can reach without touching the other.

“Vio-sama, are you there?”

“Yes, coming.”

At lunchtime, she rose at the sound of the voice calling her.
At first both she and her classmates had been awkward; the attention had felt uncomfortable.
Now she was completely used to it and could ignore the curious stares that still lingered.
Rosette was the same; the eyes that once darted nervously now looked straight at Violet.

“It’s a little cloudy and chilly today; perhaps indoors would be better.”

“Ah, that’s why I had the salon prepared. Sorry, I should have told you.”

“No, thank you so much!”

“I did choose a menu I think you’ll like, but we can still change it.”

“More importantly than my tastes, I wish Vio-sama would think about eating enough herself.”

“Of course. I hear the chiffon cake is recommended today.”

“That’s not what I meant… You’re saying it on purpose, aren’t you?”

“Oh? Whatever do you mean?”

Rosette puffed out her cheeks and glared; the complete lack of menace only made Violet’s smile spill over.
When she played dumb, those round cheeks swelled even more.
There was no trace left of the tense, strained expression from their earliest days.
To others, Rosette’s current face might seem surprising, but to Violet it suited the adorable aura she always carried perfectly.

It had been about ten days since she became aware of her feelings.

Even though she had been so confused, so terrified, wanting to erase them and even herself,
time dulls the edges just a little.
There was no lie in the feelings she had poured out while clinging to Marin,
but if there was nothing she could do about them, she had no choice but to accept them.
Now she had reached the point of thinking:
If she already knew where the roots had spread and the flowers had bloomed,
all she had to do was make sure no one ever saw them.
Give them no water, keep them from sunlight, and simply wait for them wait for them to wither.
If she herself could do nothing, she would leave the solution to time.

“It really is still cloudy, isn’t it?”

Rosette glanced up at the window and murmured in a slightly disappointed tone; more an involuntary leak than an actual topic of conversation.
Following her gaze, Violet saw a sky that looked ready to burst at any moment, heavy and sodden like a sponge full of water.

“At this rate, it might be raining by the time we go home.”

“Yes… Shall we talk somewhere else after classes today?”

They usually spoke in the gazebo where they had first truly talked; their secret base;
but in this weather it wasn’t a wise choice.
Under this sky, that already dimly lit place would take on an even eerier hue and the air would feel colder.
If rain came, both effects would only intensify, and there was the risk of getting wet and catching cold.

“You’re right. Then please allow me to make the arrangements.”

“Thank you.”

Walking side by side with Rosette, Violet suddenly noticed that the other girl’s face was just a fraction lower than her own.
Not enough to be called looking down; probably only a few centimeters.
A height difference that only required a slight dip of the eyes should have made conversation easy.

Yet a faint discomfort stirred,
probably because it reminded her of someone she had to look up at.

(Yulan.)

Since that strange parting ten days ago, she had neither seen his face nor heard his voice.

Ten days wasn’t long.
There had been far longer stretches before.
Until Yulan entered high school, they had sometimes gone months without even passing each other.
Wanting to see his face, wanting to hear his voice;
was it only guilt from that day begging for atonement?
Or was it the newly recognized love screaming to see him?

Was she unable to tell,
or was she deliberately looking away,
or were both truths at once?

If she were still the person who hadn’t known, she wouldn’t have agonized like this.
Nothing but the type of feeling had changed,
so why did everything feel so different now?

What excuses had the old Violet; the one who hadn’t yet understood love;
used to go see Yulan?